Saturday, February 9, 2013

[My Life With Rudolph] The Commands

Part of the joy of My Life With Master is that the GM (as the Master) gets to command the PC minion to commit horrendous or simply embarrassing crimes. The PC minion can try to resist, but failure increases their Self-loathing or Weariness as well as having to perform the task, or for them to just give in, so they can attempt to develop a relationship with their Connection (and thereby generate Love, which will allow them to resist the Master during the end game).

Whether they resist (and fail) or comply, the rules only stipulate that they have to make an attempt at completing the task ordered by their Master and I have found that the players were pretty ingenious with ways to screw up their task while keeping to the letter of the order.

Part of the problem running the Master is that it requires a GM to have a good list of tasks for the minions to accomplish.

So I came up with 75 dirty deeds for the minions to do for My Life With Rudolph:

1. Burn down the Christmas Tree Forest
2. Kidnap Mrs. Claus
3. Murder Mrs. Claus
4. Plant explosives in toys
5. Murder a reindeer and bring me the meat so I can eat Venison
6. Disrupt trade negotiations between the Island of Misfit Toys and Santa
7. Start an elf strike
8. Sell drugs to the young reindeer
9. Promote elf prostitution
10. Bully Christmas Town shopkeepers for protection
11. Rig the Christmas Town elf elections
12. Murder the magic seal
13. Burn down the toyshop
14. Get me the Naughty/Nice list
15. Destroy the weather station
16. Drink this experimental, yet possibly poisonous, beverage
17. Arrange for only half the elves to be paid on payday
18. Bring me Santa's magical snow globe
19. Derail the Polar Express
20. Monkeywrench Santa's Sleigh
21. Insult the Heat Miser ambassador
22. Insult the Snow Miser ambassador
23. Start a fight between the Heat Miser embassy and the Snow Miser embassy
24. Steal Jack Frost's magic wand and plant it to get someone in trouble
25. Mislabel the toys so that girls get toy guns and boys get dolls
26. Dig up the ancient elf that died last year and put the corpse in Santa's bed
27. Desecrate the elf cemetery
28. Introduce Satan worship to young, angsty elves and summon a demon!
29. Eat this experimental, yet possibly poisonous, cookie
30. Mess up the printing press in the Christmas Wrapping shop to print black skull paper
31. Kill an elf, grind up the corpse and put the meat in the elf soup
32. Make a cake, decorate with dynamite "candles" and deliver to Santa
33. Assassinate the Chief Elf and pin the crime on one of the reindeer
34. Murder the Island of Misfit Toys ambassador
35. Switch the Naughty and Nice on the Naughty/Nice list
36. Devalue the Christmas Town currency that causes a run on the Bank
37. Change the Purchase Order for round wheels to square wheels
38. Try on this experimental, yet possibly flammable, coat
39. Steal me Santa's brain!
40. Start a riot on Elf Day
41. Expose Mrs. Claus' wild youth in the press
42. Brew illegal hooch and start a speakeasy
43. Form a suicide hotline and pressure an elf who calls in to kill himself
44. Taint the elf and reindeer emergency blood supply
45. Water the candy cane trees with urine to taint the flavor
46. Monkeywrench the generator station on Christmas Tree Lighting Day
47. Try on this experimental, yet possibly brain-damaging, hat
48. Start a fight between the Elf Freight Association and the Flying Reindeer Association
49. Embezzle funds from the Christmas Tree Forest Rodent Protection Society
50. Open an illegal gambling den
51. Destroy life-saving equipment in the Elf Hospital
52. Steal Santa's heart medication and sell it on the street
53. Break all the windows in Santa's house with rocks
54. Rig the bank mortgage department to send out eviction notices to all the reindeer
55. Start a protest: Occupy Christmas Town
56. Rig the toyshop HR department to send out pink slips to all the elves
57. Monkeywrench the machinery in the Ornament shop to produce skull ornaments
58. Photograph and publish nude pictures of Mrs. Claus
59. Convince the Winter Warlock to cast a bad spell
60. Spike the Christmas Town water supply with a potion that causes Red Nose Syndrome
61. Destroy the whole Letters to Santa mail distribution system
62. Bring me Santa's donut!
63. Add Ex-lax to the chocolate candies
64. Build a trebuchet and open Elf Flying Classes
65. Legally sell Christmas Town property to Walmart
66. Legally sell Christmas Town property to Russia
67. Start an "Say No to Santa Fascism: It's OK to cry" advertising campaign
68. Start a black market ring
69. Steal plutonium from the Christmas Town Reactor and complete Rudolph's nuclear weapon
70. Make crystal-meth and douse the reindeer apple supply
71. Convert one of the old toy shops to manufacture guns and sell them to both the Heat Misers and the Snow Misers
72. Try on this experimental, yet possibly explosive, jet-pack
73. Start the cult of the snowman and lead some elves and reindeer to freeze to death during a worship service
74. Unplug the milk refrigerator
75. Capture an elf/reindeer/animal and tie him up in the woods for the wild wolves to eat

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